Tuesday, December 1, 2009

just another day

i was never the type to sit in coffee shops for extended periods of time. even in college, when most people seemed to be at folsom street coffee or market brewery, i could often be found in my norlin nook quietly studying (a.k.a. reading facebook updates). in jerusalem though, i spend a significant amount of time in different coffee houses around town. i sip tea and think about my life here, a process which has presented significant perspective into a web of dilemmas. my conclusions are honest and admittedly disappointing to some but i confidently embrace them as i hope most will. 

i look forward to returning to the states in june and do not intend on making aliyah (becoming and israeli citizen). as of now, i have no immediate plans to enroll or apply to graduate school and refuse to do so until i am absolutely clear as to why i would be doing so. i am excited to live with the responsibilities that come with financial independence and struggle just as every recent college graduate does with budgeting, bills, and designer footwear. i understand and appreciate this year as another year to 'discover who i am and who i want to be,' but yeshiva life is not real life. i learn material not relevant in a broader perspective with people i share almost nothing in common with. aside from our religious affiliations, i share nothing with my classmates (specifically collegiate experiences and career intentions), and even the mutual classification of 'conservative jew' creates tension. basically i feel as if i do not belong there and am starting to wonder why i came. hopefully i will figure it out by the time i leave if not sooner. 

don't misunderstand though, things in general are still great. i love being in jerusalem and hearing hebrew (well english with hebrew here and there), and i love meeting israelis (well mostly foreigners with israelis here and there). i have been going to a small venue to hear local bands at least once a week and i love it. i love the food and the shuk (market) and the belligerent taxi drivers who refuse to use the meter because they want to rip me off. but it's all good.

i often think about visiting and i am so excited to board the plane to denver on feb 24th at 12:05am. i want to be with the 'duplex' and the 'dnadsers' more than anything and create new memories to laugh about. i love you and miss you. 

be safe, be good, be happy, and don't be mean. oh and if any news breaks on weezy's weapons case (prison entrance date, etc.) PLEASE let me know.

i love you-lisa 

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